Confessions of a Designer Handbag Junkie

Wednesday, 17 February 2010

As you are likely aware, I am a designer handbag fanatic. I have been advised by family and friends that this could be developing into a problem, but I am confident that I have it under control. Sure, I have bounced my rent check to purchase a new purse. Who hasn't? There have been times when I have skipped out on my utility bills, so I would have enough cash to buy a new handbag. Who wouldn't?

I have spent countless nights dreaming about shopping for the latest fashionable designs. So what if I want to have Kenneth Cole's babies. I really don't see the problem here. To make my mother happy, I have made the following pledge (ever-so-loosely based on the "twelve step" program):

My name is Cathy, and I am addicted to designer handbags and high fashion. I admit that I am powerless over Prada, and that my life has become unmanageable in certain respects. I have faith that a power greater than Dior can restore my sanity. I have made a pledge to turn my will and my life over to the power of the House of Gucci. I have made a searching and fearless inventory of every handbag on bagborroworsteal.com.

I have made an admission to Chloe, myself, and my friend Sara regarding the exact nature of my wrongs. I am ready for Melie Bianco to remove all these defects of character, and I humbly implore her to remove my shortcomings. I have made a list of all the handbag designers I have harmed with my caustic language, and I am ready and willing to make amends to them all. I have gladly continued to take personal inventory of all my designer purses, and when I was wrong it was promptly admitted.

I have sought through prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with Vivienne Westwood as I understand her, praying only for knowledge of her will for me and the power to carry that out. After having this spiritual awakening, I have tried to carry this message other handbag junkies. I have tried to apply these principles in all my erm…..affairs. My name is Cathy, and I am addicted to designer handbags and high fashion.